"being human requires the authoring of one's life, of one's life story. having a coherent, functional sense of one's self requires ongoing, active engagement in this authoring process"

just something i read this morning for a paper i have to write. it struck a chord.

in my recent past i have pretty much let life happen to me. sometimes (often?) i took on this role of victim, feeling overly sorry for myself when things weren't going as i hoped, as i dreamed they might. and many times that i knew what i was doing - i understood that my attitude was my biggest obstacle to reaching my dreams. i just didn't have a clue what to do to change it.

i was not taking responsibility for my own life story.

and even now, this instant...i feel like i may be failing some part of myself. because i can't get across what i want to say..not the way other people can...because i can't paint the image i see...not the way others know how...and i drive myself away. i want to end the words and start over.

but ok.
i can. here i am with another chance to begin.

your friend always,
akula